I know, I’m in the middle of the Paolo’s series…but I wanted to ramble for a few minutes on this dreary Wednesday morn.
A 42-year-old boy blogger, named Billy wrote a funny post that made me think of this:
I loved that fucking show. LOVED IT. Look at those amazing graphics! So life-like! I totally went on all of their adventures with them in the early 70’s, sitting in front of the TV in footie pajamas, mindlessly shoveling spoonfuls of Cheerios laden with about 4 cups of sugar on top from the bowl in my lap into my wide-eyed, zombie-like face.
It was a simpler time. TV’s had rabbit-ear antennae, the enormous leaves of dark green house plants were cleaned with mayonnaise on a cloth to make them shine. Parents smoked in the house. Macrame was the shit. We watched hours of Gilligan’s Island and (if you were from the Mid-Atlantic) Captain Chesapeake while parents nursed hangovers on the weekends. Portable 8 track players rocked our bedrooms.
I had this model. I was cooler than you could ever imagine.
Sometimes I would break from watching such epic television to feed my creative spirit with a little Spirograph time.
Spirograph was also the shit. I think it was the gateway to hallucinogens.
It was a time when kids were kids, and we had to actually play with real three-dimensional board games.
Hang on, it’s flashback time!
Perfection. Probably the best game ever.
I will show this to my kids when they complain that the Wii is “boring.”
Cat’s Eye…I don’t even remember how you play, but I remember I loved it.
Operation! Suck it Uncle Wayne!
Best part was popping the cubes.
Then, shit got kicked up a notch with the introduction of electronic games! Cutting edge.
Simon. I love you Simon. I played this game ALL OF THE TIME. If I had one now I probably wouldn’t even blog.
Merlin, you were right there with Simon for me. I would also play this for HOURS.
Then, oh sweet christ…the joy. The sheer elation we experienced upon the introduction of this MIND BLOWING game that you could actually play ON YOUR TV! Can you believe your eyes?!
blip…blip….blip…blip
Fancy!
We all wasted countless hours at the kids’ house who was privileged enough to own such a high-tech game, begging for a chance to turn the dial and volley the white pixel.
And then, something AMAZING happened…there isn’t a kid from this generation that didn’t beg, borrow or steal for one.
Atari. Thank you world.
SPACE INVADERS! Clear that bottom line baby! How many hours of your life did you waste on this freaking game?!
Anyway, that’s the end of my rant. Land of The Lost took me back, and as my kids play Wii and Xbox, or Minecraft on their computer or iTouch…I just think, man, you have no freaking idea.
I guess regaling them with stories of “phones with cords” and “having to change the channel on the TV… WITH YOUR HAND” makes me old. That’s cool, fuck it, if you need me I’ll be outside till dark, riding my Big Wheel and playing doorbell ditch.
The good old days. You know you wore a hole in the hard plastic tire doing burn outs. I did.
Categories: Rememberings
tracy fulks 
When my daughter was about twelve or so, I took her to her grandmother’s house and showed her the stereo turntable, put a record on it and began to play it. I could see the wheels turning in her head (no pun intended) and she spoke, “So the music is in those ridges?”
Brilliant child, she was.
Spirograph!!! I love it.
Do you remember Creepy Crawlers? 2nd degree burns, baby!
Creepy Crawlers! Holy shit, yes…they were freaking awesome. Shrinky Dinks rocked too, I tried to make them in my Easy Bake Oven…needless to say it didn’t go so well.
Fuck. You had an Easy Bake Oven? I begged and begged.
I did, although it was really just an object of frustration. Yeah, as we all know, kids have an abundance of patience…and waiting for a shitty little cake to bake from the heat of a 60 watt light bulb was not all it was cracked up to be. In light of that, no pun intended, I attempted to put/melt many other random objects in that little tin pan, while I ate the bowl of uncooked cake batter. Much more enjoyable that way.
Love this post. We’re contemporaries for sure, I was rocking my Atari t-shirt the other day and got many complements.
I love seeing young kids in Atari shirts, having never actually seen one in their lives. Posers.
I loved that Merlin game sooooo much. Please tell Santa I would like one this year. Please??
Dear Santa,
Please send Fresh Ginger a 1970’s Merlin. She has been a very good girl.
Love,
Tracy
Dear Santa,
Please send Tracy a Perfect Polly Pet. She has been a very good girl.
Love,
Sharlea
Dear Santa,
Please send Sharlea the other Perfect Polly, as they are buy one get one free.
Love,
Tracy
hahaha — you are a true friend!
I had a lot of these. Thanks for the trip down memory lane.
It was fun, wasn’t it?!
OF Course I made a hole doing burn outs! Spirograph – I’m pissed that they don’t sell that with pins anymore – it’s all safe with some lame redesign. GIVE ME THE PINS BACK!!
I literally burned the wheels off of mine. Everything is so fucking safe these days, it’s ridiculous.
I know! – Kids don’t get to figure anything out on their own! How do you know – REALLY know” how to avoid getting hurt or doing things and learning how far you can push yourself if there’s no danger?? Kids are weak these days!! lol
We learned to ride a bike better by cracking our heads and skinning our knees. We learned that fire burns by getting burned…kids today are growing up in a cocoon, thinking that their mommies will always be there to catch them and put the straw into their fucking organic juice boxes. A generation of pussies…
AMEN! That’s why I’m a “mean” Mom. I’ve gotten mad at my kids if they ask me stupid questions – “Figure it out!” is what I’ll say if I know they just as because they don’t want to do something.
Lucky bitch, how’d you get a Spirograph?? hahaha Hell yeah, loved “Land of the Lost”, and let’s not forget H.R. Pufnstuf!!
H.R Puffnstuff! Check out Bill’s post…that’s what started this in the first place!
Awesome!! lol Great minds think alike I guess!
Tracy,
First off, thanks for the plug my friend. Secondly, I still have nightmares about Sleestacks. Thirdly, was Captain Chesapeake like Captain Kangaroo? Fourthly, I was pretty spectacular at Simon. Fifthly, I have no fifthly. Sixthly, I totally had a fifthly but thought it was funnier saying I didn’t have a fifthly but then using sixthly to say I did have a fifthly. Seventhly, I should have just said I had a fifthly, because this is getting long winded. Eighthly, apologies all around.
Sixteenthly, Captain Chesapeake was much more low budget than Captain Kangaroo. He was a known drunk…yet had a children’s show about himself…on a boat. Seventeenthly, it was weird.
I love how the intro says “he swam ’til he thought he would die”. Man I miss the fucking 70’s!
No shit. That show was a hot mess, yet every kid in the area watched it. The 70’s were beautifully fucked up.
In Hawaii, we had Checkers and Pogo. Rumor from kids who’d actually been on the show was that Checkers absolutely despised kids. I think in later years they replaced Checkers with a dog. Pogo Poge was a local DJ and beloved by kids all over the state.
I loved ‘Land of the Lost’!
Because it was AMAZING!
Did not yet hit play on your video, did not reference or google anything except my own memory… here it goes:
Roger, Will and Holly
On a routine expedition
And the greatest earthquake ever known
Something something rapids
Shook their tiny raft
And plunged them something valley down below
To the laaaannnd of the lossst!
(Roar of the dinosaur!)
How did I do?
Spoken like a woman who wore tube socks while riding her big wheel.
PS… I had a bad-ass green machine, not a big wheel!
excuse me…wore tube socks on her green machine.
Sittin on the shag pile in front of the black & white Rank Arena TV, Magna Doodling and watching I Dream of Jeanie…aaah, for the good ol’ days
Ahhhh yes. I miss the 70’s.
I want a “OMG! My Childhood!” button to click. I had just about everything on that list, except for the portable 8 Track. We went straight from vinyl to cassettes.
I bought my daughter an Easy Bake a couple of years ago…..it is now shaped like a microwave and they still really really suck at baking anything resembling what is on the package.
Holy mother of god, this post has tripped my brain out!!! I cannot believe I’d forgotten so much of this. LOL The Spirograph was only my FAVORITE thing forever! The Wonderful Ring Toss…HOURS lost to that thing. My parents still own our old Atari and a box full of games. I’ve threatened to steal it a few times. I’m not a fan of my husband and kids’ Xbox games but I will play Pitfall or Frogger for days! I can’t wait for everyone to get home later so I can blow my kids’ minds with The Land of the Lost video. Ahhhh, the non-suck times of childhood… 🙂
I loved the Atari game with the clowns being tossed from one teeter totter to another. My pop would sit on the floor indian style with a beer and a cigarette playing that game for hours.